Why is it that whenever I sit down here my mind suddenly behaves? That I can never seem to express the torrent within me. *sighs* Or is it that I just don't think anyone would really listen? ...like today... someone asked me how I was. I said "I've been better." And without even lifting her head from the computer screen, in that singsong voice of hers, she said "Oh! That's gooood!" ...what's the point? ...I spent a half hour in raging meditation... talking, if not screaming to no one in particular, and that's all that's left... after all is said and done, the conclusion not only sums up the ideas found *in* the torrent of thought, but defines it so neatly from without... what *was* the point? I don't want this anymore. "Can I be somebody else for all the times I hate myself?" Yes... I realize I'm in darker moods more often in here than in real life... but... *smiles* no one's really listening anyway... it's all good.